Pretty Hurts

Beyoncé has recently performed a master piece, a song that captures and reflects the empty heart cry of our culture... Pretty Hurts.

"Pretty hurts, we shine the light on whatever's worst
Perfection is a disease of a nation, pretty hurts, pretty hurts.
Pretty hurts, we shine the light on whatever's worst,
We try to fix something but you cant fix what you cant see
Its the soul that needs the surgery"

The song speaks of the constant push for perfection, chasing after beauty and affection but never succeeding, about being unsatisfied, always feeling like you're not enough.

If I lose a bit of weight, then I will feel confident...
Once I get some new clothes, then I will be beautiful...
When I get fit then I feel strong...
When I act happy then people will accept me...

You are chasing this feeling of being beautiful, of being strong and accepted, that feeling that is always just out of reach, but close enough to keep the chase going. You see it in other people, they look happy and confident, so if you can be more like them, you'll be able to feel like they do. Decide what you think the world wants to see, shut everything else up inside and just show them the pretty parts...
Friend, I want to tell you a secret. This pursuit you've embarked on has no end, it's a round track you're running on. You will chase skinny and beautiful and accepted forever, but they can't be caught.

The knowledge that you are loved and beautiful is a sacred truth, reserved for those who throw down the baton and quit the race, those who stop pleading the world to give them something the world doesn't even have to offer you, even if she wanted to.

Instead, there is a God who has made you exactly as He wanted you, and he has called you good. He has said you are beautiful, that you are worth everything to Him.
You don't need to change. You don't need to strive anymore.
I believe in a God who loves me as I am and this knowledge, when it reaches deep into my heart, gives me the freedom to stand tall, to make mistakes, to smile and mean it.

And now I can stand on the side lines of that never ending racetrack and call out to those weary and empty runners, telling them I found what they're chasing, that it's right here and they don't need to  run anymore.

I don't like you.

Scrolling down facebook...
Oh, that person wrote about their trip to Bali - "Like"
Hey there's the photos from my cousins birthday - "Like"
Inspiring quote from a well known author - "Like"
Someone tagged me in a nostalgic photo from high school graduation - "Like"

There is this thing we do on Facebook... We feel some vague interest toward what we see so we click the "like" button, sometimes even before reading the whole thing, then quickly move on to the next thing we "like".

Now, I'm not against Facebook... in fact, I use it regularly to catch up with people and share parts of my life there. But as someone who uses Facebook and who watches what's happening in society, I have two issues with this "like" business.

Firstly, people (especially amongst younger people) are beginning to confuse being liked on Facebook with being liked in real life. Their self worth is depending on how many likes they get on what they post. I frequently see posts such as "50 likes and I'll post a video of me singing" which is really saying, show me that I have worth and then I'll have the confidence to put something up which makes me vulnerable. Or "Like for a Like" which is the routine of me "liking" your post and then you'll write to me telling me something you like about me. This one really makes me sad because it assumes we need someone to tell us they like us before we have the confidence or the motivation to compliment them, but also because the people "liking" these posts are not feeling valued or worthy enough so they are searching for someone to tell them what is good about them. That breaks my heart. I often hear the youth I work with talking about how many "likes" their profile picture or video got and comparing numbers...

Secondly, "liking" something doesn't even mean anything to me when I see that.
 I often post photos that I've taken, because I am good at photography and want to share the photos I have the privilege of capturing, mostly with the people who are in the photos in mind, or sometimes to share the beauty of the country we live in. And usually when I post photos, people will "like" them, sometimes people that I would never even usually talk to in real life. And even though I feel glad that you looked at it and appreciated something about that photo... I always wonder, why did you like that? Are you friends with someone in that photo? Do you also like the ocean? Do you appreciate the same simple beauty I do about that daisy? Did you like that photo because you've also travelled there and appreciate how long the hike is?
I want people to share with me why they felt some appreciation or connection with the photo I just posted. But when the same person goes through and "likes" 20 of my photos in the space of 2 minute
s, that does nothing except block my newsfeed and tell me you're flicking through them really really fast.

So I've set myself a challenge and want to challenge you to also try this...
I've decided that I won't like anything else on Facebook unless I'm prepared to also comment about why I like this. Let's make Facebook a tool to honour and uplift and appreciate people.

Give them your love, not just your like.

Bucket List challenge # 2 ... Midwinter Swim. Complete.

Kirsty Foster...  Went for the classic but eternal when she assigned my bucket list challenge... Midwinter Swim!

Some friends and I jumped in the harbour a couple of months back and that was painful and not inspiring to do it again. So when I was given this challenge by Kirsty I decided I wasn't going in on my own... So on June 15th, I joined at least 200 other brave souls for the official Dunedin Polar plunge!

Unfortunately my camera was out of battery, but these are some of the official photos from the day.

 

As I was standing waiting for the countdown, staring at the grey waves hungrily lapping the cold sand, I was genuinely nervous... But once everyone started sprinting toward the surf and diving headlong into the wintery goodness that is midwinter swimming, adrenaline took over and there was no going back!   Big shout out to everyone over 70 who denied their age and did it anyway and those kids too young to realise this is a bad idea and did it anyway because their parents said it would be fun.

When my head went under the water, every self preservation skill I had said to get out as fast as possible, and valuing my life, I did just that!  However, there were a large number of people who apparently don't have those same voices of reason and stayed in up to ten minutes!

 

Thanks Kirsty for the challenge, it was fun and I'm glad we did it!!

Bucket List Challenge # 1.... Build a 2 metre Sandcastle. Complete!

Ashley Mountfort... A wonderful friend who always sees the positive and the good and possibility and grace in every situation. Someone who has a playful childlike spirit in a world of adults who have stamped it out... You're beautiful.

Your bucket list challenge for me was to build a 2 metre high sandcastle with the little popcorn bucket you gave me. Today I did it!  Well, we may have picked up some tools from the Hardware store so that it didn't take 5 hours to make!
With the help of Tegan and some friendly kids on the beach... We had a fabulous time in the sun and wind! Feeling like a child again, playing in the sand, listening to the gulls and breeze and waves.
Thank you for giving me a challenge that made me be a kid!

Here is the photo evidence...

Starting out.... With our handy tools from Mitre Ten Mega and the trusty popcorn bucket



This, my friends is why you build a moat first! Because of the rouge waves!



The waves were AMAZING today!



The these two kidlets joined us! Moved to NZ from NY just 5 days ago, they're loving the beach!

Okay, so they tried to help.... but mostly just threw sand around and broke the edges cause they couldn't get close enough... But we appreciated the company!



The finished product!  With the moat round the edge and the bucket on top, it would have been pretty much 2 metres tall but definitely 2 metres long and wide.

The. Bucket. List

This year I feel that God is going to do something really exciting in my life... I'm going to go on more adventures and exploring and rick taking than before. I'm going to learn to love more extravagantly than before. I'm not going to waste as much time inside my comfort zone this year.

So for my birthday I asked those who were celebrating with me to each bring a bucket list item and I would do my very very best to complete ever single one of them before I turn 22 next year...

I thought this would be interesting and fun but I had no idea what I was in for!  I love it because each of these challenges represent a bit of the person who gave it to me... their excitement about something or a bit of their passion or interest and I love it!
All of the ideas were amazing, I was blown away by their creativity and ridiculousness.

This is a photo of the original list, but I will type it up too... And as I do each of them I will write about it and post some photographic evidence of me doing it!
The name of the person who issued the challenge is written beside each one too.

Thank you everyone!
This will be an exciting year!

1. Create an artwork in a public place - Chloe Palmer
2. Dress up as a vegetable for a day - Lauren Sharp
3. Gather a group of people together at uni and make a human pyramid - Ben Campbell
4. Pick a recipe book and work your way through it - Jennie Verstappen
5. Mid winter Swim - Kirsty Foster
6. Take a photo every season in your favourite place for that season - Carlie Paterson
7. Learn how to do the splits - Amber Pemberton
8. Write your own worship song on guitar - Emma Ross
9. Take a photo in 5 iconic Dunedin places and do something creative with it. Bring people you haven't gone to those places with before - Nicola Jacobs
10. Have a day where you only eat food starting with the letter A - Kerah Bruce
11. Find a love for something you don't already love - Abby Williams
12. Make a 2 metre sandcastle and then wash the bucket, put popcorn in it and watch a movie with a friend - Ashley Mountfort
13. Make Sock Puppets - Ashley
14. Squirt 20 unsuspecting people with a water gun - Ashley
15. Have a dinner party with random utensils such as a whisk, beater, potato pealer etc - Sarah Greaves
16. Where a onesie everywhere you go for a day
17. Go to the supermarket and buy groceries for the person in front of you and yell as loud as you can "You are AWESOME" - Garrett Chin
18. Go busking with your guitar and film it until a stranger gives you money - Mum
19. Complete one of the "Great walks" with your dad and others of your choice - Dad
20. Go skydiving - Grace Boston
21. Go bush in Fiordland - Tegan McNeish
22. Find something everyday that takes your breath away and tell someone about it - Sophie Aldersley

22 things to do before I'm 22..... Lets get started!!

Get out of the armchair people!

The other day I was talking to a friend in the evening and asked how her day had been...
The reply went something like this, "Oh, it was okay... pretty boring. Just another day, you know."

And it struck me in that moment how absolutely tragic this is... Not just her, but for the thousands of students in this city that go home everyday and say something similar.

Another day lost into the canyon of boringness and nothing and apathy.
Friends, we only have a limited amount of these days, we can't keep pushing them off the edge like this!

And I decided in that moment that I would never lose another day into that terrible place again... That every day I would search for variety and something new to do. That I would push for interesting conversation and plan for the unexpected to happen. That every day I would venture outside those ten foot thick walls of my comfort zone.

We've sat too long in the lazy boy of our comfort zone that we didn't realize it had turned to boring and expecting nothing zone and now we're trapped in it!
It's time to get off the armchair people!

We have a certain amount of 24 hour lots. Lets' stop throwing them away.

Sunday is Coming. Hold on.

Friday happened.
Jesus, the God man was beaten and murdered so that we could know God again.
To destroy sin and death and the distance between heaven and humanity.
The mob happened, the flogging happened, the cross happened.

Then He died.
And the people went home.

And now it's Saturday.
Nothing has changed really. Jesus is still dead.
There is still blood on the ground, the people still hate each other, the tomb has been sealed up.
Death seems to have won this time.

Saturday is waiting. It's longing. It's hoping that maybe this isn't the end even though everything looks like it is.
Saturday is the time between the blood tests and the doctors phone call.
Saturday is the time between the funeral and going back to work.
Saturday is after the fight, walking away hoping desperately they'll come after you.
Saturday is when you're lonely at night and the computer is there with all the secret images you look at, the ones you wish you didn't want to see but do anyway.
Saturday is the time between burying the bulb and seeing it come up.
Saturday is when everyone thinks you've moved on and they stop asking you, but really its' still hard to get up in the morning and do life.

Saturday is the hardest.
Friday was pain and death and suffering and grief, but everyone saw it, it was obvious.
Saturday is the silence.
No one really speaks of what Saturday feels like.

But just like every Saturday. It will end and Sunday will begin.

Now Sunday is the day that death lost every hold it ever had on humanity.
Sunday is the day God said Give Me My children back!
On Sunday Jesus finished the battle of Saturday and rose to life again, ending Saturday forever!

Sunday is life.
Sunday is the moment you realise maybe you will get through okay
Sunday is forgiveness
Sunday is the first rays of the new day
Sunday is that laughter you didn't think you would hear again.
Sunday is leaving the hospital
Sunday is walking away from the graveyard knowing where that person has gone to and looking forward to the reunion
Sunday is the kiss of heaven and earth

Friend, if you're stuck in Saturday.
Remember, Sunday always comes.
Hold on.