The kitchen light in my house this year is a bit funky.
You turn it on and a few seconds later the light comes on.
At first I didn't like it.
I would stand in the doorway and wait for the light before I went in.
But now I know what is in the kitchen.
I know that the light will come on.
Because I flicked the switch.
So I just walk in now.
And wait for the light.
It always comes.
Sometimes when I pray, nothing happens. I don't feel anything or see anything change.
People are still hurting, the cancer is getting worse, friendships aren't getting better.
The light doesn't come on.
But I know I prayed.
And I know my God hears me.
And loves me.
So it's okay to keep walking.
Into the dark.
Because the light is coming.
it's coming.
Monday, 29 April 2013
Saturday, 13 April 2013
Humanity is Messy. real messy.
I'm the kind of person who likes everything to have some sort of place and role that I can tangibly define.... My room may be messy sometimes but I hate it and would rather have everything in boxes and shelves, all my school work is in labelled folders and size ordered. If I start writing or drawing and mess it up, I always want to start again with a new piece of paper. It confuses me when people say something but do something else. I like to understand things and when I cant I feel frustrated until I have worked it out. I like to plan and when things change a lot, I can roll with it but would much rather not.
But at the same time, I thrive on creativity and spontaneity, I love theatre and art and nature....I love movies that have unpredictable ends and stories that twist the listener all over the place.
Having a weird mix of both of these things sometimes confuses me and I'm not sure of how they quite fit together...
But recently God has been teaching me a lot about how people and cultures and humanity as a whole is very messy and unpredictable but that He loves us when we are like that. That He is in the midst of the tension we feel about social justice and spending and sustainability. That He is in the middle of complicated community dynamics of power and humility and integrity and initiative.
He is just as present in math and logic and science as He is in art and music and theatre and He longs for His children to see Him in both.
We have a God who didn't shy away from our mess and confusion and striving, but stepped right down into the middle of it, became a part of it and made something beautiful out of it.....A redeeming of creation that He continues to do today, in the most unexpected of places and people.
The empty lot which became a graffiti art wall. The restless tense high schooler who took up boxing as an outlet and is now on his way to national champs. The Saturday night youth group that runs right next to the night clubs. A community garden planted where the preschool was burned down by an arsonist. Chalk drawings on the city sidewalk. The math teacher who genuinely cares for her below average students and wants to see them do well.
And in that, there is an invitation to join Him, to not shy away from the messiness of humanity, but to embrace it, enjoy it. Redeem it.
But at the same time, I thrive on creativity and spontaneity, I love theatre and art and nature....I love movies that have unpredictable ends and stories that twist the listener all over the place.
Having a weird mix of both of these things sometimes confuses me and I'm not sure of how they quite fit together...
But recently God has been teaching me a lot about how people and cultures and humanity as a whole is very messy and unpredictable but that He loves us when we are like that. That He is in the midst of the tension we feel about social justice and spending and sustainability. That He is in the middle of complicated community dynamics of power and humility and integrity and initiative.
He is just as present in math and logic and science as He is in art and music and theatre and He longs for His children to see Him in both.
We have a God who didn't shy away from our mess and confusion and striving, but stepped right down into the middle of it, became a part of it and made something beautiful out of it.....A redeeming of creation that He continues to do today, in the most unexpected of places and people.
The empty lot which became a graffiti art wall. The restless tense high schooler who took up boxing as an outlet and is now on his way to national champs. The Saturday night youth group that runs right next to the night clubs. A community garden planted where the preschool was burned down by an arsonist. Chalk drawings on the city sidewalk. The math teacher who genuinely cares for her below average students and wants to see them do well.
And in that, there is an invitation to join Him, to not shy away from the messiness of humanity, but to embrace it, enjoy it. Redeem it.
Tuesday, 26 March 2013
These past months, God has been revealing Himself to me through these images of the ocean, revelations of His heart through His creation... So I've made some of them into this.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the infinite depth where no one has ever been,
the unsearchable mysteries of the trenches and valleys.
There are things to see in the depths, My child that no one can tell you about because their eyes have not seen and their hearts have not felt what happens in the deep of God.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the frothing, boiling waves that hurl themselves at the coast.
Time and time again, never ceasing, a constant reaching for you, drawing you into Myself.
I am the power and strength you feel when you come walking in from the sand. Those who play in the waves, who respond to My invitation will feel My joy at their abandon.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the ever moving currents, the unseen mighty swells far from land.
My ways are sometimes unseen but I am always at work, moving, dynamic.
I carve coastlines and hearts, mixing up currents and governments.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the colour and vibrancy of an entire kingdom living below the surface. Just like My fish and sea creatures don't breathe like those on land, neither can life in My kingdom exist in the same dimensions as the world. Here things are backward and upside down, unlike what the world has taught you. Mourning and brokenness, urgency and poverty. Passion and joy, humility and authority.
I am the ocean said God.
And you're still standing on the beach.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the infinite depth where no one has ever been,
the unsearchable mysteries of the trenches and valleys.
There are things to see in the depths, My child that no one can tell you about because their eyes have not seen and their hearts have not felt what happens in the deep of God.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the frothing, boiling waves that hurl themselves at the coast.
Time and time again, never ceasing, a constant reaching for you, drawing you into Myself.
I am the power and strength you feel when you come walking in from the sand. Those who play in the waves, who respond to My invitation will feel My joy at their abandon.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the ever moving currents, the unseen mighty swells far from land.
My ways are sometimes unseen but I am always at work, moving, dynamic.
I carve coastlines and hearts, mixing up currents and governments.
I am the ocean said God.
I am the colour and vibrancy of an entire kingdom living below the surface. Just like My fish and sea creatures don't breathe like those on land, neither can life in My kingdom exist in the same dimensions as the world. Here things are backward and upside down, unlike what the world has taught you. Mourning and brokenness, urgency and poverty. Passion and joy, humility and authority.
I am the ocean said God.
And you're still standing on the beach.
Saturday, 9 March 2013
Limiting factor
TIME.
In Chemistry, we were learning about the limiting factor. The chemical which you have least of in the reaction, so when it gets all used up, the reaction stops. Even if there is plenty left of everything else, the reaction is stopped by the lack of the limiting factor.
So far this year, time has been my limiting factor.
This city is amazing, the people I've met are fascinating and I want to know them. There are so many clubs and sports teams I want to join... and every church has incredible ministry opportunities that I want to get involved with. Then of course there are all my lectures and tutorials and labs and study work that I need to do....
I have energy and want to do all these things but the time is not enough to fit everything in.
But above all of it, I know that to meet with God daily, to be intentional about the word, about prayer... that's more important.
So I take an hour everyday to rest in Him, to not be consumed by a life that is so full and busy and colourful and noisy. And in turn, my God who is outside of time allows me to fit the things that are important into my day, even when its seemingly impossible.
Aside from the busyness, I am loving heath science... it's a course that challenges me mentally everyday (especially after taking a year off!) and the content is so captivating, I see the incredible complexity and design of God in the way the human body works and defends itself. I see His attention to detail in the microbiology of cells and see the logic and order of God in physics.
I am so aware that barely any of His children get these opportunities I have.... to live in a wonderful campus, to study at a prestigious university, learning about the body and how to care for it. I am so blessed to be here and I want to keep a spirit of thankfulness about it all, in a student culture that seems to swing between being stressed and worried to not caring about anything at all.
Here are a few shots that have been snapped at various times in the past few weeks....
In Chemistry, we were learning about the limiting factor. The chemical which you have least of in the reaction, so when it gets all used up, the reaction stops. Even if there is plenty left of everything else, the reaction is stopped by the lack of the limiting factor.
So far this year, time has been my limiting factor.
This city is amazing, the people I've met are fascinating and I want to know them. There are so many clubs and sports teams I want to join... and every church has incredible ministry opportunities that I want to get involved with. Then of course there are all my lectures and tutorials and labs and study work that I need to do....
I have energy and want to do all these things but the time is not enough to fit everything in.
But above all of it, I know that to meet with God daily, to be intentional about the word, about prayer... that's more important.
So I take an hour everyday to rest in Him, to not be consumed by a life that is so full and busy and colourful and noisy. And in turn, my God who is outside of time allows me to fit the things that are important into my day, even when its seemingly impossible.
Aside from the busyness, I am loving heath science... it's a course that challenges me mentally everyday (especially after taking a year off!) and the content is so captivating, I see the incredible complexity and design of God in the way the human body works and defends itself. I see His attention to detail in the microbiology of cells and see the logic and order of God in physics.
I am so aware that barely any of His children get these opportunities I have.... to live in a wonderful campus, to study at a prestigious university, learning about the body and how to care for it. I am so blessed to be here and I want to keep a spirit of thankfulness about it all, in a student culture that seems to swing between being stressed and worried to not caring about anything at all.
Here are a few shots that have been snapped at various times in the past few weeks....
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| This is my wonderful room! The orangey object in the right is actually an old fire place! |
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| At any given time, you'll be most likely to find me here... |
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| Bridget taking over my room.... love it |
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| This is Mackenzie and Chloe, the girls who live in my house (there are more but I barely ever see them) we decided that Friday night was not okay for studying... so we got sundaes instead! |
Wednesday, 20 February 2013
Skype!
Skype is a wonderful thing.
Today I talked to a few really special people and felt so blessed to be able to connect with them and see their faces even though we are so far away.
I look forward to the day when all of God's kids will be in one place and time zone!
Today I talked to a few really special people and felt so blessed to be able to connect with them and see their faces even though we are so far away.
I look forward to the day when all of God's kids will be in one place and time zone!
Monday, 18 February 2013
Scarfie City
After a wonderful year of playing everyday all day, apparently it's time for me to go to school and be serious again... that's unfortunate. No, I lie, I'm really excited to get back into study and school and libraries and nerdy things like that.
I've been down in Dunedin for almost a week now and am loving it (for those of you who are not familiar with the term "Sacrfie" it's a name for student who studies at Otago)
Here's a quick summary...
Things I love about this so far:
1) My room is bigger than texas and has a big ledge up by the roof which I can climb and sit on.
2) My house is on a hill so I'm going to get fit walking back and forth from classes all day
3) There are students EVERYWHERE and everyone seems pretty friendly for the most part
4) I met other people who love Jesus within a few hours of being here and it really encouraged me
5)Dunedin is full of wonderful quaint old houses which are now dirty breaking student housing which no one looks after.... the irony and contrast in this fascinates me and I would love to photograph them sometime but have to try and do it while people aren't watching... apparently its not okay to take photos of other people's places
6) I've got to reconnect with friends from my school year who I haven't seen in a long time
Things about this which make me a little nervous:
1) My house is on a hill so I'm going to get fit walking back and forth from classes all day
2)There are 2000 students doing health science and only 200 places for them to fit into med
3) Alcohol runs like a river through these streets as soon as dark hits and it sort of breaks my heart seeing people lying in the gutters too wasted to move
It's been interesting coming back to the school environment after being away... Last year I worked full time and was so far removed from the school scene. I grew up and stopped caring what people thought of me, and for the most part lived and worked with other people who felt the same. Now coming back into an environment of 17 year old freshmen who just desperately want to fit in and be okay, it's exhausting. But I understand. Because I was the same, completely.
I start class officially on Monday and will write more about that once it gets underway :)
I've been down in Dunedin for almost a week now and am loving it (for those of you who are not familiar with the term "Sacrfie" it's a name for student who studies at Otago)
Here's a quick summary...
Things I love about this so far:
1) My room is bigger than texas and has a big ledge up by the roof which I can climb and sit on.
2) My house is on a hill so I'm going to get fit walking back and forth from classes all day
3) There are students EVERYWHERE and everyone seems pretty friendly for the most part
4) I met other people who love Jesus within a few hours of being here and it really encouraged me
5)Dunedin is full of wonderful quaint old houses which are now dirty breaking student housing which no one looks after.... the irony and contrast in this fascinates me and I would love to photograph them sometime but have to try and do it while people aren't watching... apparently its not okay to take photos of other people's places
6) I've got to reconnect with friends from my school year who I haven't seen in a long time
Things about this which make me a little nervous:
1) My house is on a hill so I'm going to get fit walking back and forth from classes all day
2)There are 2000 students doing health science and only 200 places for them to fit into med
3) Alcohol runs like a river through these streets as soon as dark hits and it sort of breaks my heart seeing people lying in the gutters too wasted to move
It's been interesting coming back to the school environment after being away... Last year I worked full time and was so far removed from the school scene. I grew up and stopped caring what people thought of me, and for the most part lived and worked with other people who felt the same. Now coming back into an environment of 17 year old freshmen who just desperately want to fit in and be okay, it's exhausting. But I understand. Because I was the same, completely.
I start class officially on Monday and will write more about that once it gets underway :)
Wednesday, 13 February 2013
Summer: [noun] warmest season of the year
Summer is defined by the dictionary in probably the most boring way I can possibly imagine to write... if I were to define it, it would include things such as...
Smelling cut grass, Leathery feet from walking in bare feet all the time, permanent red shade to exposed body parts, constant thirst, rough salty hair from being in the ocean lots, waking up to the sun and birds, barbeques at 9 at night because it's still warm, lying on the grass reading a book, washing drying in 20 mins on the line, sleeping with just a sheet.... something along those lines anyway.
This summer has been very short for me, just over 3 weeks, but I've appreciated it more than ever after coming from the constant sub zero temperatures of Canada! These are just a few photos which I feel sum up this summer the best, because pictures speak thousands of words and take much less time to blog about!
I've been blessed to have spent time with good friends and family, with quality conversation in beautiful places... couldn't ask for more!
Smelling cut grass, Leathery feet from walking in bare feet all the time, permanent red shade to exposed body parts, constant thirst, rough salty hair from being in the ocean lots, waking up to the sun and birds, barbeques at 9 at night because it's still warm, lying on the grass reading a book, washing drying in 20 mins on the line, sleeping with just a sheet.... something along those lines anyway.
This summer has been very short for me, just over 3 weeks, but I've appreciated it more than ever after coming from the constant sub zero temperatures of Canada! These are just a few photos which I feel sum up this summer the best, because pictures speak thousands of words and take much less time to blog about!
I've been blessed to have spent time with good friends and family, with quality conversation in beautiful places... couldn't ask for more!
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| Kaiteriteri beach, the day after I got home... I missed the smell of salt! |
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| Windy beach time. The wind on the beach makes me so joyful! |
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| Wild flowers on Teapot Valley road, love biking up here |
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| Lake Rotoiti! The classic shot that exists in everyones summer album |
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| Sunrise over Marahau, the glory of the Lord shines upon us! |
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| Rabbit Island.... |
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| Ice cream on the road side by the dairy.... couldn't get more kiwi than that! |
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| Off the rope swing and the rocks into the river, could do this all day! |
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| New Zealand. How I love camping. |
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| Abel Tasman.... I live in the most beautiful place on earth |
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| My friends. I love them. |
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| Beginning of the journey... |
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