Off the Road Resolutions

Out of all the days of the year, these last three or four days are the most forgotten, neglected and ignored... Most of us are already living in the new year, making plans, planning what it will be like, dreaming of a fresh new start. In these last few days, diets, exercise plans, organisation and budgeting gets forgotten as we abandon everything in anticipation of a new beginning on the 1st...
(Poor little 31st, gets forgotten every time...)

These are the top ten most common new years resolutions in the world:

1. Lose weight and get fit
2. Quit smoking
3. Learn something new
4. Eat healthier
5. Get out of debt
6. Spend more time with family
7. Travel
8. Be less stressed
9. Volunteer
10. Drink Less

Whether or not people actually follow through with these is another story, but I think all of us do it... The New Year is rolling around and we start thinking of new things to do, new goals, life changes we want to make.
I know that Jan 1st is no different from April 6th or August 18th or March 11th, but there IS something refreshing about the new year.

So, here are a few things that I want to try this coming year, areas of life I want to be intentional about. I wanted them to be life bringing and creative, avoiding the typical ten I wrote above.
These aren't measurable goals, nor will I ever fully achieve them, but that's okay too.

Ask more questions
Overtime I've learned something about the majority of people... we love to talk about ourselves. a lot. and when people ask us questions about ourselves, we feel important and honoured.
So I want to intentionally ask people more questions. To find out the things they're good at and ask about those things, because then I get to learn cool new things and they are valued and feel important.
For example, I went walking with a friend and I had my camera. She knows I enjoy photography so she started asking me about how I see a good photo and what things like shutter speed and aperture mean.... and because I know photography, it makes me happy to talk about it and valued as someone with those skills.
So the next day, I was talking to a different friend who is studying opera singing. I know nothing about opera, neither am I particularly interested in it... but I started asking her questions about the history of it and what makes a good opera singer and how people train for it.... and in doing so, I totally gained a better understanding of the opera world and she was valued as an opera singer.
Brilliant. Everyone wins.

Be okay with not being good at things
Sometimes (alright, a lot of the time) I hate it when I don't understand something, or I'm not good at something and I will try and make it seem like I've had more experience in something than I have or slightly exaggerate the story of how many times I've done something...
This year I want to get better at not being good at things.
To be able to say "I've actually never done this before, could you teach me?"
Or when someone asks me for help with something, to be able to say "You know what, I actually don't know a whole lot about that, but [insert name of someone wiser smarter and stronger] is really good, do you want me to ask them for you?" Rather than trying to bluff my way through it because I hate admitting I can't help because I have no idea what they're talking about!

Stop being nice
I really love it when people are happy and have everything sorted, especially if I can help them get there. I like it when people aren't fighting and when conflict isn't under the surface just waiting for a prime moment.
Except sometimes that means that try to please everyone and can't say no to anyone who needs help so I get way over busy and end up neglecting things that are important. (Like sleep, that's kinda necessary)
So this year I want to get better at saying no, better at telling people when I'm tired and need to stop, when I'm frustrated or annoyed telling people that I love them but can't be with them right now.
I have a friend who pretty much never does something unless she wants to  (or its actually important, like studying, or running, or cleaning) and sometimes she says that no, she won't help me with a project I'm doing, which is sometimes slightly annoying, but I know that whenever she does say she'll do something, she'll genuinely want to be there and will pour everything into it. I like that.

Make interruptible plans
I think it's important to plan. To make goals and have a list of stuff that needs to be done this week.
I'm pretty good at it.... But occasionally my plans and lists stop me from experiencing some awesome things because grandma really needs that email sent by 4 32 pm.
I want to try and create plans that get things done, but also have room for sunsets that need to be seen from the top of the hill, or for a chat with the buskers, or a late night cry session with a flatmate....

Much Love,
Liesh